Mourning

I had this plan.  Give up my favorite foods for a few weeks.  Then start to test them.  Surely my favorite foods would be okay.  Milk, eggs, cheese.  I’ve never had a reaction to them before.  I won’t have any problems.  Yes, I was worried about bread.  I may be gluten intolerant.  But I can find alternatives, so it will be okay. 

That’s what I told myself. 

And I started with high hopes and great courage, eating healthy foods, feeling better, working my way to the glorious day when I could eat the foods I love again.

I began with cheese.  Cheese, glorious cheese.  And all was well.  Then I added milk.  Oops.  Not so good. 

It’s amazing how distressing it is to have a food you love be taken away.  Especially when you weren’t expecting it.  I am definitely having unpleasant reactions to milk. And I am having unpleasant reactions to the idea of not drinking milk.

Just to be sure I will test again at the end.  But now it is time to move on.  To pretend milk was not one of my top three foods.  One of my favorites.  And hope that later I will not react badly, that milk will not be forever gone to me.  Or that I will at least find a way to bring it back.

Heavy sigh.